i suppose last saturday wasn't a bad day la... haha... it was super fun.. i think we're sick of mini toons and something different, that two shops.. haha... oh well.. one of my fren got caught for dating.. poor thing.. i told her to tell her mo la.. cuz that's the best thing to do anyways... so i went home t share with my mom.. oh my gosh i tell u ppl! after i finish saying the story to her, she suddenly say, i tell u wang choon ying, best is don't date at all at your age.. like duh i know! i'm like resisting so much now lo~ haha... i juz wanna see wat will happen if i don't be with this player.. wonder can i get a better guy.. haha... see la... james is being so annoying now.. he keeps getting me in trouble... but i'm not gonna complain since i got myself into this mess myself la.. hehe... up till here la... bye~

stupid mistake of mine!

cried the whole night.. haiz. now eyes a litle swollen.. cried for a stupid reason... but i think i was even stupid to let go of that once in a lifetime chance.. why didn't i think? why did i rely on my friends to make my decisions? 10 representatives from each school... 2 from each form.. highest scorer in english.. creative writing workshop in sm sains... that school is one of the best school in kk... but no, i was thinking abt my friends more than my studies... if they give a certificate, it'll so help me to get my future scholarship.. but i did a stupid mistake.. i told my techer before i consulted mom, yee and God... great~ but who can i blame but myself for being so foolish? haha... i guess it's already a past, no point blaming anyone but myself... next time i'll be more alert n remember the lesson i've learnt this time... the good thing is i get to go 1B la. haha... oh btw, if u ask why i didn't say i wanna go is cause some ppl run away when i juz told them i got asked to go to a workshop and another one gave me a scary stare.. u want me to tell them i wanna go to the workshop? not likely to get killed am i? thanks God He doesn't run away from me when i have troubles..

ah! ah! ah! he's making me go crazy! seriously! he can make me hyper and all melted inside and the other way round also! why?! why is he the one?! haiz... hate him as much as i like him! ish! budu! budu! budu! he keeps saying something so true! "you know i like u but you won't believe in it. why?" reason is cuz i wanna be with u that's why! the more i wanna be with u, the more i wanna stay away from u. i don't wanna get hurt! if all this was true, do u know every night i can sleep with a smile on my face? i can score high marks juz to show u i'm smart n cute? i can do everything cuz of u... but i don't wanna believe it's true. if it's not true? if you're playing with my feelings? i'll crash. i will. don't say no. i know i'll crash. uh! you use so many words that show u like me. i wanna believe in it. but i don't wanna too.. tell u something. i'm fine with dating, juz get my family's approval. if u can, i'll be with u. so simple. but you're leaving. wat's the point?

hate myself... i hate it when i have to be the evil one... i always say i love it... but do i? is this the real choon ying? i'm telling the freaking whole world choon ying is missing! she's growing up to be someone else... i dono wat to do anymore... cry? laugh? hide? act? throw my temper? blame others? no.. i can't do anything.. why? cuz everyone wants me to be perfect... fine.. u want perfect i give u perfect... everyone expects the best out of me.. i don't do my homework means i'm bad.. i forget stuff, i became stupid. wow... want me to be perfect? ok. i will. juz u ppl wait n see... you ppl want me to be wat u want me to be right? even if i'm not a normal teenager anymore right?? ok. i'll be it then.

went to skool today to help my english teacher to do some of the class work.. it was kinda fun.. haha... teacher bought kit kat for me to eat.. YUM! and i got to see three classes's oral results for the second term.. wee~ didn' sms much today.. wakaka... don't feel like smsing anyone.. haha... it's so freaking boring man the holidays... luckily the exams are over...YAY! gonna go out for my two best frenz birthday.. hooray!!! luckily mom let me out this time.. wee~ short update la.. lazy write so long.. haha

why? why? why? stupid!!! why? he makes it so hard... i don't have any feelings for him anymore but he.. he juz makes it hard.. we made a conclusion that we won't end up together.. but why must he say stuff that make me feel like last time? hmm... weird... it's so ironic.. he does stuff that make me think more than i am suppose to... i know i shouldn't think too much.. but it's kinda hard.. but i am so gonna put in all my effort.. i promise... as much as i want him to stay here for his studies, i hope he'll go overseas faster... so i can forget everything that has happen before.. please...

sometimes u think ppl around u that are so close to u understand wat u wan but they don't... i really wonder is there a person that knows wat i want when i need it besides God... it's really a mind boggling question... i got really hurt today... haha... cuz i forgot how scary ppl are.. even ppl who are older than u... not meaning my family here ok? haha... haiz... in the end of the day, the only thing i can do is to do my part n let God take care of the rest.. like wat one of my teachers said before.. ^^ so every night when i pray, i feel good.. i dono why but i always feel better after talking to God... many ppl don't believe in Him, i wonder why...

hi hi! haha... my secret place.. i think.. ^^ anyways everything's over.. exam, him, and my life after form five..=.=.. kiddin but anyways.. we'll see... hmm.. wonder who's next.. i wanna try to focus on my studies now.. seriously hope i can handle myself after that incident.. haiz.. why do i still have a feeling he didn't meant wat he meant when he told me he like me then.. although i'm over him not but it feels weird.. like i fell for his trap... as in he say he like me but it's not true.. dono la.. past is the past.. ive the future la..^^